Thursday, February 21, 2008

Winter Nightmare

“...waitin’, WAITIN’, waiting for the world to change…”, my alarm clock smugged at me. I slapped it with satisfaction in order to snooze for seven more minutes. Already disgruntled by hearing Mayer first thing in the morning, I had difficulty retrieving the threads of the bitchin’ dream I was in the midst of. I lay there in my jersey sheets, under a quilt, a wool army blanket, and a comforter thinking, “Is that my breath I see before me?”

I could linger no longer, lest I be late for work. I jumped out of bed, grabbed my clothes and ran into the bathroom to get ready. God, it’s cold. I turn the radio on in time to hear the weather. Four degrees. Four degrees! How much longer must I take this?!?

“A little over three weeks,” said the Groundhog.

“Seriously?” I said to him, hands on hips.

“Sorry, Dawg,” he shrugged, “My shadow don’t lie…peace out!” he said. He flipped up his collar, sneered at me, and ran after my cat.

Goddamned stupid rodent.

What can I do but wait for the world to change?

8 comments:

  1. To answer your final question, turn up the furnace?

    Or is that being just a tad too literal?

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  2. pfft. *I've* been telling you what to do for nigh on 4 years, but you like th' change o' seasons too much to follow my advice.

    Seeing yo' breath INSIDE the house IS a major P.I.T.A., though. Oh, and personally, I wouldn't trust anything that flips up it's collar anymore-- that went out with Simon LeBond.

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  3. SD: Practical advice is always welcome. I'm not sure how much it will help, though. Our bedroom and bathroom were added on and there's no basement, therefore it's always about 10 degrees colder in our room than the rest of the house. Maybe I should start sleeping on the couch...

    HT: I'm falling out of love with the change of seasons. But I don't think I would ever move to FL. Arizona, on the other hand...I'll tell you what: I'm considering it.

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  4. That groundhawg blew it out the hole, yo!

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  5. Hang in there girl, this is the only time of year we hate it.

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  6. Evil Genius and I are working on a weather machine / mind control device. It should be ready by winter 2010, hang in there.

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  7. That's right, Beckeye!

    Genn6---how right you are. I'll hang tough.

    Do you need any help with the packaging, Pezda's Ghost?

    HL: Well, if it's for the good of the cause...

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