Monday, July 13, 2009

Things To Do When You're Sleep Deprived

  • Recite tongue twisters

  • Stare thoughtfully at your calendar and try to replicate REM condtions with your eyes open

  • Play a guessing game with yourself: "Who's real and who's a hallucination?" or "Did that happen or did I dream it"

  • Take a typing test, save scores as a baseline so when you've had a good night's sleep, you can take the test again and win a "Most Improved" award

  • Hone your old man/woman face by pursing your lips and frowning

  • Really try to listen, you'll be surprisd at how much you miss!

  • Think about Pitfall for the Atari 2600 and try to remeber how to get over those ponds

  • Talk in a southern accent (if you're already southern, try a midwestern accent)

  • See if you can pass a roadside sobriety test



  1. "Oh what can it mean to a daydream believer and a homecoming Queen!"

    Other suggestions: Write your screenplay for a blockbuster porn movie about secret agents. Look in the neighbor's window to see how well he is sleeping. Call yourself on the telephone and see if you have anything interesting to talk about. Have several beers.


  2. Remember the character Roy Schneider played in Blue Thunder? He would check his sanity with a stop watch to see how fast he could drive out of the parking garage.

    You could try that?

  3. I know it sounds stupid, but I just work. A good friend who suffered from insomnia much more acutely than I do, once said, "Consider wakefulness to be a gift."

  4. Kvatch - that sounds like an idea there. It's not like I don't have plenty to do!