Thursday, August 23, 2007

My Snotty-Ass Rock N Roll Mix

I volunteered to put together eight songs (plus one bonus track) for Volume 2 of the Green Monkey Music Project over at Splotchy's Joint. I and four others, including Splotchy himself, Chris, Big Shoulders, and Bubs put together our best set of f-you music. I felt I was an authority on this kind of music (not anymore! these guys are the professors of snot...and I say that with affection) and I'm proud to bring a feminine element to the project. Below is my rationale for choosing the eight plus one. There is a thread going through them all and the order is important. It's kind of like a snotty-ass sound track for growing up.

Track 1: Welcome to the Jungle, GNR

I chose this song because it represents a free-for-all of partying, posturing, and aggression. Its title may seem polite to the uninitiated, but I believe it is ironic. Afterall, do you truly welcome someone somewhere by telling them you hope to watch them bleed and scream? It is a classic rock song and one that always makes me feel tough when I listen to it. It also represents a time in one's life when it's all about the party and the hunt.
Track 2: Smells Like Teen Spirit, Nirvana
Here we are now, entertain us. Now that we're in the jungle, we're bored and disillusioned. We've brought our guns and we really can't be bothered to shoot them off at the sky anymore. Oh well, whatever, nevermind...This song defined an era and it still makes me feel like a badass when I listen to it, even though it went mainstream. I have nothing against the main stream per se, but I prefer the fringe.
Track 3: Smile, Lily Allen
So now we've broken up. And you're calling me up on the phone so you can have a little whine and a moan, it's only because you're feeling alone. At first when I see you cry, yeah, it makes me smile Yeah, it makes me smile. At worst I feel bad for a while but then I just smile. Yes the best revenge is a life well-lived. This song's sweetly mocking tone is delighfully skewering.
Track 4: You Outta Know, Alanis Morissette
And now we've broken up and this time it's rougher. And I'm not going to be able to sweetly mock. I'm actually going to tell you off and blame you for everything. This tune is very liberating, for the ladies. It also rocks.
Track 5: Union Maid, The Old Crow Medicine Show
So, we've found ourselves a union man and we're no longer fighting with men, rather fighting The Man. Cause married life ain't hard, when you've got a union card. A union man has a happy life when he's got a union wife. Oh, you can't scare me, I'm sticking to the union 'til the day I die. You don't know how much this song has been going through my mind recently. I'm in a union and I'm married to a union man. Life is sweet when you can flip The Man the bird.
Track 6: SexyBack, Justin Timberlake
OK, I know I'm gonna get some shit for picking this song. But I don't care and neither does JT. He really throws down:
I'm bringing sexy back
Them other fuckers wait till I attack
If that's your girl you better watch your back
Cause she'll burn it up for me and that's a fact
Besides, he did bring sexy back. This song is a prowler and intense. I love the attitude. Besides its got a great beat you can dance to.
Track 7: Survivor, Destiny's Child
So, now we've broken up again and you left saying some pretty mean things, but they never stuck, jerk. Now that you are out of my life, I'm so much better. You thought that I'd be weak without ya, but I'm stronger. I'm a survivor (what). I'm not gonna give up (what). I'm not gon' stop (what). I'm gonna work harder (what). I'm a survivor (what). I'm gonna make it (what). I will survive (what). Keep on survivin'. Once again, we remember that living well is the best revenge. And this time, we're going to rise above petty games. You know I'm not gonna diss you on the Internet. Cause my momma told me better than that.
Track 8: Married with Children, Oasis
So, now we're married. And I hate the way that even though you know you're wrong you say you're right. I hate the books you read and all your friends. Your music's shite it keeps me up all night. There's no need for you to say you're sorry. Goodbye I'm going home. I don't care no more so don't you worry. Goodbye I'm going home. And it will be nice to be alone for a week or two. But I know that I will be right back here with you. This song captures the unique kind of snotty-assedness felt between married people. Sometimes, you just can't wait to get that other person out of your hair, and when they're gone and reason returns, you realize you've got to pull it together again for the sake of your love, your vows and your children. It's amazing what a cumulative effect a long-term shared history does for the strength of a marriage. Doc's Pass System is nice too.
Super Secret Bonus Track: Add It Up, Violent Femmes
And we're back to free-for-all. I first heard this song on a bootleg copy of a bootleg copy I got from a super cool friend of my older cousin when I was about 13. I listened to it in secret; it was the first song I'd ever heard that used the f-word. It's delicious and malicious because I wait my whole life for just one...DAY after day I get angry and I will say that the day is in my sight when Ill take a bow and say goodnight.
Many thanks to Splotcy for the opportunity to participate!


  1. Great descriptions!

    I myself remember hearing my brother's copy of the Violent Femmes album as a younger lad.

    It was oh so naughty!

  2. What about Happy Together by The Turtles?

  3. Great list, some unexpected choices, but well-explained and described!


  4. It takes balls to follow up Shakespeare with Guns 'n Roses Flannery, I applaud you.

  5. I could totally see Nellie Olsen's face on that mix CD. You should design packaging.

  6. Thanks, Splotchy; I think a good mix needs a story line.

    Echo: Oh, you!

    Bubs: Thanks. I call myself an authority on f-you music, but after reading all of your tunes and everyone elses, I have a lot to learn. I am humbled.

    GKL: Thank you, but, in my mind, Shakespeare and GNR fall into the same category: Rock Gods.

    Beckeye: I think I will. That's my next post.

  7. can you believe her shoes??

  8. Great tunes Flannery and as Bubs said, some I mightn't have thought would make the S grade. Your descriptions flowed like, well, snot. The good kind. You know what I mean.

  9. Excellent work Flannery.

    I was the one distributing the Voilent Femmes to the underclassmen at school.

  10. I love the first two. No comment on the rest.

    Shakespeare is a rock god. His plays include murder, suicide, black magic and bodily dismemberment. He was the Heavy Metal of his time.

    This post was extremely well written. You are the rock goddess of blogging!

  11. BO: I know! Aren't the fucking awesome?!

    Dale: You're too sweet.

    Pezda: Why does this not surprise me? Though your bootlegs probably had awesome cover art, rather than "The Femmes" written in sharpie.

    Elizabeth: Thank you...and I know you are showing marvelous restraint regarding a majority of my choices. Tell us, what do you really think of SexyBack?

  12. I'm glad you added a feminine touch to the project, but not without bringing a bucket-full of attitude in your songs. Great descriptions too. There's attitude (snottiness) to be found in nearly all genres, fo sure.

    thanks Flannery!

  13. You represented the women well! Great list.

  14. SexyBack feels long and OVERLY repetitive, but I can handle it for a couple of minutes.

    One of the women at work plays her radio at her desk and she used to get really upset every time this song would come on. Here, she was offended because she didn't know it was a man singing, she thought it was a woman. It was the "I'll let you spank me if I misbehave" line. Once I finally convinced her it was Justin Timberlake she thought the song was kind of funny. That song would seem more over the top if a woman sang it. Anyway, her reactions to that song always cracked me up.