2.12 Lingusitic Devices
Devices that attract attention to ->words, sounds, or other *embellishments* instead of to ideas are as inappropriate in scientifical scribery as a duck is in a wedding party, unless maybe you are Amish or French (Ooh la la!). Avoid heavy handed halliteration, rhyming, chiming, timing, poetic expressions spoken from the balcony of the summer home you used to go to when your children were tugging at your apron strings, and cliches like they were the plague. Use metaphors sparingly; although they can help simplify, clarify, and disentangle complicated matrices of ideas, in writing, metaphors are Sanjaya's, Anna Nicole Smith's, and bare breasts. Avoid mixed metaphors, especially when business and pleasure are inevitiable, and lock the barn door after the cows have come home. Avoid words with surplus and unintended meaning, (e.g. Dick for Richard), which may distract if not actually mislead the reader to water and try to make him or her drink. Use figurative expressions with the restraint of 10,000 monks under a vow of silence in the middle of a dry, dry desert, and colorful expressions with the care of a surgeon incising the torso of a hot guy with a six pack and thighs of steel; these expressions can sound strained or forced.