Sunday, May 23, 2010

Celebrities Who Appeared in my Dreams: Dale


I was getting ready for some folks to come over for my birthday when Doc popped his head in the bathroom and told me that Dale from Passion of the Dale was here.
"Really?!?" I asked, stunned.
"Yeah," Doc said, "He came all the way from Canada for your bithday."
"Huh," I said and started to put on makeup.
Once I was ready, I tried to decide how to best make my entrance. I went through a couple of ideas in my head before stepping into the garage and declaring, "Wilkommen, bien venue, welcome!"
Dale was sitting on the couch in our garage talking to my Uncle Charlie. He looked up and tipped his beer at me and went back to his conversation. I began to look around the garage and wonder what Dale's impression was. I knew he was judging and that he had an opinion. I was very curious. But this curousity hampered me. I couldn't think of anything to say to him or anyone else in the room. And I felt bad that he had driven all this way to be so underwhelmed. Until, of course the zombies arrived.

56 comments:

  1. Did the zombies come for your birthday or just a neighbourhood sweep??

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  2. A few things:

    Did I miss your birthday again? Just like me to forget and then show up to haunt you in another form.

    Wow, my hair is a lot shorter now than it was in that photo. Strangely, or not, was in my own garage yesterday and today! While I was puttering around and the iTunes treated me to random songs, something from Cabaret came on. Wilkommen indeed! Only, it wasn't that song. It was "I Don't Care Much" which is not to say this is what I'm feeling right now.

    I'm constantly judging but so are we all, show no fear my dear Flannery.

    Have you seen Zombieland? It was pretty hilarious.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My birthday, of course G!

    Dale, fear not: my birthday is a week from Monday...that still gives you plenty of time to get here. You can get here by aeroplane...you can get here by bullet train but just get here, as the great Justin Guarini once warbled.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I always thought that Uncle Charlie tried to dominate the conversations!

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  5. How can you not dream about Dale? He's dreamy.


    Sometimes, nightmare-y, but mostly dreamy.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I still missed your birthday didn't I? I'll sing and see if that helps: I can dream about you, something something something mine.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 保護您婚姻的權益,提供專業大陸抓姦服務;
    老公內地包二奶不去大陸抓姦只會讓老公與二奶逍遙快活而您的權益卻被剝奪!
    迅速大陸抓姦服務,守護您的權益;大陸抓姦問題交給專家,
    豐富大陸抓姦經驗、堅強法律團隊、以您的權益為優先!

    ReplyDelete
  8. 多年不見的麗心竟然當起了女子偵探
    如果不是因為懷疑老公外遇,我找上女子偵探幫忙,
    這才見到這個好友!女子偵探真的不如想像中的輕鬆,
    麗心說當初也是因為自己老公外遇,
    後來誤打誤撞才當起了女子偵探
    主要就是希望能夠幫助女性朋友解決婚姻問題!
    後來我不但靠著麗心的幫忙順利解決了老公外遇的問題,
    更多了麗心這個女子偵探好友!

    ReplyDelete
  9. 茜茜知道他有了外遇
    他變得春風滿面,嘴裡總是哼著歌曲
    他開始變得有耐心聽她說話、會買禮物給她、甚至帶她出遊
    茜茜知道這是因為他對外遇有愧疚
    她沒有揭穿丈夫的外遇,甚至享受這樣的生活
    茜茜偷偷的跟姐妹滔說:感謝老公的外遇帶來更美好的夫妻生活!

    ReplyDelete
  10. 專業外遇蒐證讓出軌者無所遁形!
    許多人放肆出軌就是因為清楚另一半沒有時間外遇蒐證
    因此只要矢口否認對方也無可奈何!
    把您外遇蒐證的需求交給我們,
    專家當您的分身為您徹底外遇蒐證
    掌握對方出軌證據!
    專業外遇蒐證守護您婚姻權益!

    ReplyDelete
  11. 根據外遇調查報告顯示一成民眾坦承外遇、四分之一已婚者擔心伴侶出軌!
    如果沒有外遇調查,您怎知對方心裡真正想著誰?
    對方滿口的謊言藉口,如果沒有進行外遇調查您又該怎麼戳破?
    合法徵信公司專業外遇調查服務,
    24小時徹底跟監絕不馬虎,提供最優質外遇調查服務!

    ReplyDelete
  12. 就像一般抓姦的戲碼一樣,她衝進去看見難堪的場面,
    男人因為被抓姦而惱羞成怒的想要動手打人,
    第三者沒料想到會被抓姦而驚慌失措,而女主角,
    冷漠的看著這現實的一幕...抓姦,讓她更看清楚事實!
    抓姦,也讓她更知道是離開的時候了!

    ReplyDelete
  13. 從一開始她就知道,她只是一段婚外情
    然而戰勝不了寂寞,所以即使是眾人不看好的婚外情
    她還是寧願有個伴,即使自己變成婚外情中的角色。
    剛開始她也是溫柔體貼的善盡婚外情的角色,
    然而時間過去,她愈來愈不甘心這段感情只是婚外情
    她開始想要更多,開始要求更多...

    ReplyDelete
  14. 表姐交了一個人人欣羨的男友,
    聽說家裡面很有錢,每個人都很為她祝福。
    沒想到結婚之後才發現一切都是男方的謊言,
    表姐想要離婚,對方卻死不放手!
    看到了這情形,讓我想到了婚前徵信的重要性;
    雖然很多人認為婚前徵信是一種懷疑的表現,
    但是如果不做婚前徵信,又怎能知道對方刻意隱瞞的事實?
    現在我有了論及婚嫁的對象,爸媽也很贊成婚前徵信
    婚前徵信的結果對方果真的家世清白孝順的新好男人;
    帶著滿滿著祝福與喜悅,我總算能安心的當準新娘!

    ReplyDelete
  15. 心存懷疑就要去查證!很多人懷疑伴侶通姦
    卻寧願選擇相信對方欺瞞的藉口,
    最後導致通姦問題變得難以解決!
    通姦的人不會自己承認,當您懷疑伴侶通姦時,
    不要相信對方的藉口,應該要積極去查證,
    讓實際證據告訴您伴侶是否通姦

    ReplyDelete
  16. 許多人以為外遇發生就很難感情挽回
    其實只要在外遇初期,感情挽回幾乎都是可以成功的!
    夫妻多年的感情不是短時間就可以磨滅,
    加上孩子親情的呼喚、自身的努力,感情挽回其實不如想像中困難!
    然而許多人卻不知道對方早已外遇多年,
    伴侶與第三者建立出難分難捨的情誼,
    感情挽回自然困難度就提高許多,
    想要感情挽回就需要更多技巧與付出更多努力!

    ReplyDelete
  17. 您的問題不需要自己一個人獨自承受,專業徵信隨時在這裡為您服務!
    不管是外遇離婚,或者是事業問題,專業徵信都能協助您解決。
    專業徵信公司絕對合法、優質徵信專員值得信賴、合理收費保障您的權益,
    24小時專業徵信服務不打烊!

    ReplyDelete
  18. 誠信公正徵信協會,為民眾推介合法優質徵信社,避免受不肖業者的敲詐!
    徵信協會以維護消費者權益、提高國內徵信市場水準為目標!
    徵信協會公正的維護消費者權益、希望能協助委託人獲得更好的徵信品質。
    面對不肖徵信社您不該妥協,讓徵信協會為您伸張委屈!
    徵信協會,以您的權益為優先!

    ReplyDelete
  19. 新婚一年,我們竟然就相敬如冰!
    當初被沖昏頭,沒發現她如局外人的冷淡,於是我合理的懷疑,她有外遇!
    於是我找上徵信社為我調查,
    徵信社的回報資料攤在我眼前,我真的難以接受,
    我一直為了要給她過好日子每天努力工作,
    然而她卻在同個時刻帶男人回家溫存!
    徵信社進一步的調查之後,甚至發現他們早就在一起很多年,
    根據徵信社給的資料,我才發現,原來她只是因為我的錢才嫁給我!
    那麼我們剛出生的孩子,極可能也不是我的孩子嗎?
    如果沒有請徵信社幫我調查,到底我還要被利用多久!!

    ReplyDelete
  20. 明知道他有婚姻,筱蝶還是陷進去了
    他告訴筱蝶,不是不願意離婚
    只是孩子還小,他不忍心孩子這麼小就面臨父母離婚的難題
    他告訴筱蝶,他有多麼愛她
    他多想馬上離婚光明正大和她在一起
    他告訴筱蝶,她值得更好的人,但是他捨不得放手
    只要給他兩年時間,他就會馬上離婚
    多麼動聽的話,為了他的承諾,筱蝶甘心傻等
    一心等對方離婚、一心想要成為他的太太
    然而當兩年的時間過去了
    男人還是沒有離婚
    他淡淡的對筱蝶說:我配不上妳,所以我要放妳自由!

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