What Do You Mean I Went 2 Days Without Posting?

I simply don't remember not posting to my blog. I'm sure I did it on Friday and now it's Monday. And I challenge you to prove to me the alleged "weekend" was an actual two solid days.

It wasn't.

First of all, I was in motion all weekend. So, it may have looked like two days worth of activity from where you were sitting. But for me, time bended in such a way that my perception of it was that it was not two days, but rather about four hours.

And Since perception is nine tenths of the law, I am of course correct.

The weekend was only four hours, which does not equal a whole day. It's only a sixth of a day. And you got a sixth of a day's worth of posting from me on Facebook, plus some Disco Empire updates and some "Which Harry Potter Character Are You" results from my children.

As far as I'm concerned, I haven't missed any days and am in compliance with NaBloPoMo.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Mirth Finding

So, God bless Some Guy, right? I mean, his exhaustive list of blurbs about the people on his blogroll was really wonderful. It brought back memories of a golden age, when blogging was new and exciting.

When I started blogging, it was scary. I had a really tough job where outrageous things would happen to me but if I talked about it to anyone in a format that could be traced back to me, I'd be toast. But I needed to write and I wanted it public. So, I started this blog and called it "Prone to Whimsy" so that I would remember that this is a place for the fun, silly, random stuff that crosses my mind and capture the small moments in my life that reverberated meaning. Things that floated into my day, dipped down and rested in my hands, then floated away again.

But something happened...maybe Facebook, which is so much more instantly gratifying. It allowed me to flit in and out without leaving much substance behind. I still feel kind of cheap when I reduce one of the meaningful moments in my life to a status update.

But back to this blog. I've always wanted my writing to be personal here. I wanted you to know me. I wanted to share the little things in my life, the marvelously mundane. The tag I use to categorize that kind of thing is "A Day in the Life of Flannery" and the last time I used it was in January. So, that's what, over seven months, right? Seeing Chris' post about me and my blog and reading the comments brought all that back home to me. In particular, my throat caught at this one:

"Flannery is one of those rare bloggers who, after you've read her, you'd run up and hug her on first meet because you just *know* her." - Beth

I was presented with proof that I've done what I set out to do. At least one of the people who reads my blog feels like she knows me. But anyone who has started reading this since Janurary probably wouldn't have the same reaction.

Fortunately, I've had Flash Fiction Friday to keep this blog from going completely defunct. But that's my fiction, not my facts. And while it's become very important to me, I feel a kind of loss for the other stuff.

Frankly, I've been resistant to sharing too much here. As you may know, my husband is going through a rough patch. Well, we both are. And I've circled the wagons, closed ranks. I've had to. What do I share here? How do I sort out my own head? How do I find the whimsy again amidst all this strife and angst. It's easier to just let it sit while I play Bubble Pop Party Island and shut out the world.

Well, I'm back, baby. I'm raising the windows and getting a little air in here. I'm shaking off the dust cloths and refilling the larders.

In short, I'm bringing whimsy back.

So thank you, Some Guy and Beth, for turning on the lights.

What I Hate About Facebook

Before Facebook, I had an idea about my generation (X, that is). Publically, I abhorred the idea that we were being "labeled." But in my heart I kind of dug the label. Because what is X if not something unquantifiable? It's pretty cool.

But then I joined Facebook and hooked up with a bunch of ghosts from the past, namely Friendwhores who happened to go to my high school. I'm an old softy from way back and I found I couldn't resist someone who wanted to be my friend, even someone who for all intents and purposes was a complete stranger to me.

Well, today, I unfriended someone for the first time. This asshat, let me call him "Brent," would fall into the "complete stranger" category. And his status updates would alternate between the very banal to Howard Stern-lite type remarks. For example, one day he would say, "I have to stop treating my body like an amusement park." Then next day: "Happiness is mostly a byproduct of doing what makes us feel fulfilled."

In fact that last remark is what finally gave me the courage to jettison him from my Friends list. If I wanted to hear that kind of bullshit pablum, I'd go hang out at the flea market and read the appliqued sweatshirts or country-style wooden signs. Also, the amusement park remark was not even clever enough to be entertaining. it was too obvious.

These type of status updates beg the questions: Where is the profundity? Where is the irony? On Blogger, that's where.

I guess I blame blogging for having my expectations set too high. Bloggers of a certain age are so much more like what I imagine my generation is like. And having run into so many like minded bloggers who started off as strangers for the most part, I was given over to the assumption that most people my age who are online are exactly the type of people I'd point to and say: there's a fellow Gen-X-er! Sadly, many of the people who find themselves in my graduating class are cheesy and outwardly wholesome-sounding and don't represent themselves well as cynical, frustrated, unmotivated slackers I expected them to be.

Alas.

Is Blogging Going the Way of the 78?

Do you feel nostalgic when you sit down to post something to your blog? I'm starting to. I'm remembering the hey-day, for me anyway, when there was a certain vibrancy to it. But now, it feels like thumbing through the card catalog: It feels like a task, an obstacle to getting to information and feedback. Especially after Facebook came into my life.

I've thought about not blogging. Didn't work. I tried to set goals for myself so that I would write/comment more often. I began to feel that, even though I don't have cable and I still don't have time to catch up with my catalog of favorite shows, how the hell can I blog?

Maybe now's not the time in my life. When I'm at work...I'm working. When I'm at home, I'm with the kids. When the kids are in bed, I'm on Facebook or listening to the DVD commentaries for the Simpsons or Futurama...or, if I'm lucky, a new Father Ted from Netflix (thank you Dr. Monkey Muck for showing us the light!).

I just don't have the opportunity...since shiny Facebook came along. What's better than "Liking" something there? It shows I stopped by and that I care. Because of it and it's simplicity, I'm closer to far-flung relatives, both physically far flung and genealogically far flung, than I've ever been in my life. I'm playing D&D (thanks Frank Sirmarco!), I'm farming, I have a fishtank, I have an appartment! I'm catching up with people I knew and barely knew in high school. I know my co-workers better and like them for it.

It's bizzare and intoxicating. It's Hi-fi, digital, THX communication.

But...

It's somehow lacks the authenticity. The groove has been melded into a sleek metallic grapevine. While useful and somehow easier to deal with, it can't compare to the comfort and ease I get while sliding your blog off the shelf and cranking up the Victorola to revisit your latest post, which is two weeks old. There's something in the quality there...

So, I think I'm going to do what my Dad would do. I'm keeping my collection and I'm still adding to this old blog. I'm going to stop by and visit, even if I have nothing to say. Because if I got rid of them, I'd lose the original record...it would be like tossing the old 78 that captured my Grandpa's performance (in drag, mind you) of his interpretation of Mae West singing.

Come up and see me some time, sailor. Landerhaven Ho!

Riley Blogs!

You've asked for it...she's done it.

If you comment, please be nice and use good language...or I'LL THUMP YOU!

UPDATES: Blogger Meet Ups and The Blog Card

Hey, everyone! I'm back from Tennessee, home of Monkey Central: Playground of Dr. Monkey Muck. He and his lovely gal, Sparky, hosted me for a fabulous evening of food and laughs. It's fun to meet up with blogger buddies...they're strangers, but not strangers. We know a lot about each other, just not what it's like to be in the same room together.



The Good Doctor and Sparky kept me laughing and laughed at my silly self. We learned that we are all pretty much normal too, which is a comfort. Their home was lovely and cozy. We gabbed and gabbed and drank and I got the tour of Monkey Central and and a private showing of the impressive Swag collection. I actually got to sample a monkey mint, courtesly of GKL.



I'm glad they welcomed me into their home because the could have just as easily told me to shove it. See, I thought I was flying in on Monday, which is usually the way it works for business trips around here. I had all kinds of plans lined up. I had even packed. Then I learned Monday morning that the trip was actually for Tuesday...UGH! All that angst for nothing! I then spent Monday feeling like I may have slipped into a Final Destiny situation.

But all scheduling sins were forgiven and the Trip was a huge success.

So now that the girl's birthday party is over and I made it through my conference last week and a business trip this week, I finally found the time to send off the Blog Card. I'm ashamed to admit that I've had it for over two months. But it's on it's way to the lovely Bad Tempered, Snow-Covered Zombie, Barbara. I hope you enjoy it as much as we did!

As you may have noticed, I have a bit of a time management problem. But take heart, we got a new riding lawn mower that has reduced our grass mowing time from 4 hours to 13 minutes, if you consider the time it takes to do donuts in the monster during your victory lap around the lawn. Othewise, it only takes 11 minutes. I hope this improves my response time.

But back to the topic of blogetherness. I'm going to be in Olympian Fields, IL May 11th and 12th and my evenings will be free. I wonder if anyone in Chicago blogs...Let me know in the comments or via email at GREENPEARL42 at yahoo dot com if you want to get together.

And in other news, my co-workers have learned of my vendetta against Mel Gibson. I came back to work today to find that scraggly-assed picture of Mel Gibson tacked to my cube wall. A certain co-worker spearheaded this escapade, let's call him Buttercup. He's been surruptitiously planting pics of MG at my desk all day. I just keep taking them down and giving them back to him. He then tapes them up on his cabinet. He's going to have quite the collection.

So all's well in the kingdom as I settle into a new summer routine, filled with good will and a spring in my step. I'm lucky the people in my life both here and out there are endlessly entertaining and wonderful. Thanks for being the you that you are.

Love,
Flannery
xoxox

The Crazy Eight Besties!

Coaster Punchman named me as one of his Crazy Eights! I fall into a great company of bloggers, who ask me to post these words:

“These bloggers are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.”

It’s a tag game where Coaster Punchman had me at "exceedingly charming." And I always say "It takes one to know one!" CP hosted me in NYC and I was not only charmed, I was bewitched. This one's for you, CP!

Tanya Espanya, whose name comes up first when I think Crazy Eights. She is totally interested in self-aggrandizement, which should boot her out of the running, but her exceeding charm and friendship cancels that out. Go over there now and crush her with your love.

Skyler's Dad is an American Hero. He's here to make us laugh and remind us what life is all about. And all the times I post something, he's right there to chime in. God bless you, old friend. Read his stuff and leave him a comment.

Evil Genius, a rock and roll astronaught with an eye for beauty that is captured by argyle. Watch as his walkman starts to melt and he takes over the universe.

And Spooky McGee is correct: Moonlight Feels Right! Spooky is a dear friend who's seen her share of adversity (and yours) and still manages to be fabulous. Spend an evening with her and a glass of wine...you won't be sorry.

Deadspot is anything but. He's a watchdog and pop culture vulture, read: totally up my alley. Visit him and you'll find tasty zingers and recaps of your favorite shows. Also look for his wit right here in the comments section...

Beth will knock you out with her mix tapes and is there in a pinch when you find yourself in need of REM covering Tom's Diner. She's sweet and sassy and ready to start something fun.

Chris is another blogger I met face to face and someone I'd call a friend. I mean who else can you rely on for politics and poop in the same breath. Wait...that doesn't sound right. Check him out and you'll see what I mean.

Grant Miller must be mentioned here as one of my Crazy Eights. I was blogging a short time before I found him through a site I can't find anymore "You so drunk." The lab coat got me and I've laughed almost every time I visited him. And without him, I probably wouldn't have found most of the people above. Grant Miller Media: A nexus of blogging.

And there you have it, boys and girls...your homework. Now get on out of here and go visit my friends.

The Blog Card!

Ok, so here it is! The Card! It arrived safely in my hands a couple of days ago (ahem...weeks...ahem) and I'm pleased to have an opportunity to review it and add to it. Dale kindly offered me his photos so I wouldn't have to wear my fingers to the bone copying and pasting. But that still proved too labor intensive at this point. So, I filmed the card. Enjoy the virtual tour (with bonus ambient work noise)! And please visit the lovely contributors listed below.

Thank you so much for deeming me worthy, Dale! I plan to take your suggestion and forward it to another worthy one...Barbara at Bad Tempered Zombie!






Amy




Teri




Jen




Miss Alex




Nobody




Midleah




Sushiboy




Sans Pantaloons




Skyler's Dad




Scarlet




Dale

By the way, there are rules for this kind of thing and here they are:

Official rules & regulations:
• When You Get "The Card"post a photograph/scan of it's arrival & contents

• Ask readers to leave a comment if they want the card next

• Pick the blogger who is worthy...Dale asked me to send it to Barbara at Bad Tempered Zombie, so I shall!

• THEN add your name / url plus a nice message or creative addition to the card

• Include a copy of the official rules with the card• Send it on it's way to the next worthy recipient•

Send it out fast..- no putting it on the mantle an admiring it for 3 weeks...(Sorry!)

• Can a blogger who has already received the card - be sent the card again? - Yes!

• What if there is no room left on the card? -ADD A NEW PAGE - IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE!~

Science Lessons

When I was in Kindergarten, I learned that water boils at a certain temperature, but in places of high altitude, like, say, Colorado, you have to wait longer or heat it higher for it to happen. It gave me this habit of mind, whenever I have to boil something, my mind wanders to Colorado or the Continental Divide (featured in the movie with the same name). Then I'd move on to other things.

But tonight as I was waiting for the water/milk to boil for mashed potatoes, I did go to Colorado...but it didn't stop there. My mind turned to Skyler's Dad, and GKL (both of them). It made me smile to have a reason to think about you away from the computer.

This recent Halloween Pagent was great fun, thank you officially Beth, from the bottom of my heart. I found some new blogs and reconnected with some old pals. (Cormac Brown, I'm talking to you.) The spirit of fun and commaradarie generated by this pageant were a breath of fresh air in this dire time. It was a fine example of what's best in blogging.

So to anyone new out there: Hello and welcome. I'm looking forward to holding you in my thoughts.

To everyone who stops in: Hello and I read your blog today...it was AWESOME.

Gifts

You know, I love the new blog link thing that automatically updates itself so I can tell at a glance who's been naughty and who's been nice. If you don't have it, I recommend it. It's a minor pain in the ass for great payoff. Just click Custmize at the top right of the page, add a page element, and choose Subscription Links.

It's really maximized my reduced amount of blogging time so I can spend more time writing and, most importantly, commenting. I've also been able to take up some reading. Doc, the sweetheart, bouth me a copy of David Sedaris' new book When You Are Engulfed in Flames. It's as wonderful as it sounds. He's the first person since Erma Bomback that made me snort out loud while reading one of his books. I highly recommend it.

My First Blogging Award!

I've been awarded an Arte y Pico Award by the inestimable Hot Lemon, which was nice because He didn't even make me beg for it. According to the designer of this award, "This prize has arisen from the daily visits that I dedicate to many blogs which nourish me and enrich me with creativity. In them, I see dedication, creativity, care, comradeship, but mainly, ART, much art. I want to share this prize with all those bloggers that entertain me day to day and to share this prize with those who enrich me every day."

So, here are the rules:

1. You have to pick 5 blogs that you consider deserve this award through creativity, design, interesting material, and also contributes to the blogger community, no matter of language.



2. Each award should have the name of the author with a link to their blog.



3. Award winners have to post the award with the name and link to the blog of the person who gave them the award.



4. Please include a link to the “Arte Y Pico” blog so that everyone will know where the award came from.



5. Show these rules.

I believe I am in compliance with the above but I've also added value to this award: specific evidence of greatness so you can zoom right in. And without further ado, on we go to the awardees...

1. Deadspot on the Web. This sassy, savvy catchphrase-generating monster is one of the unsung heroes of the blogosphere. He's got his eye on the man and reports wittily on the stupidity of corporate America. He also recaps Top Chef, so you can keep up. I recommend you check him out and read the backlogs. Leave him lots of comments too, because I fear he might be drifting away. Either that or there are just periodic dead spots over there.
   
   Evidence of Deadspot's Greatness
   
   
2. Amy at Mish Mash. Amy is the mother of teenagers, which is enough to earn her an award any day. However, why I'm giving her this award is because her playful attitude with an edge makes her commentary art. Her subject matter spans the gamut from breakfast cereals to Hummers and her assessments are spot-on. I like the way this girl thinks. Find your way to Mish Mash you will be pleasantly delighted. Just be careful; you may snort your Alphabits while reading her stuff.
   
   Evidence of Amy's Greatness
   
   
3. Tanya Espanya. This saucy Canadian will make you laugh, cry, and squee with her zany antics, her honest assessments and her beautiful baby. She has such a funny way of saying things that always catch me by surprise. When she's not trotting the globe with her family, she's crushing you with her love. In fact she loves us all so much, she has made the greatest effort in meeting each and every one of us. In fact, I hope to meet her next month!
   
   Evidence of Tanya's Greatness
   
   
4. and 5. Artful Dodger and Mix Tape Girl at Rants Raves Life and Anything Else That Comes. This lovely couple have bravely started a blog together and a marriage, God bless them. They are simply wonderful. Not only do they have great handles, but they are both excellent writers with a knack for revealing their inner monologue in such a way that is neither self indulgent nor annoying. In fact, their reflections are beautiful. Spend some time with these newlyweds; it's totally worth it.
   
   Evidence of Mix Tape Girl's Greatness
   Evidence of Artful Dodger's Greatness

Thank you, awardees, for your contributions. You have added something wonderful to the world and we have noticed. Keep the faith.

Love,

Flannery
xoxox

Blog-Ohio Jamboree!

Doc and I decided that the only way we're going to make it to a blogger get together is for us to host one ourselves. So, we're going to. Why don't you save the date and see if you can get here!

BlogOhio Jamboree

"Show Your Wits!"

7:00 p.m.

Saturday, May 31st, 2008

Mulligan's Pub

Canton, Ohio

Let me know in the comments if you want more information or if you want to rsvp.

Why I’m Behind Madonna’s Decision to Remake and Star in Casablanca

Like you, I was appalled by the idea that anyone would remake what is virtually a perfect movie, let alone that it was Madonna and that she wanted to play the part of Ilsa in the remake. I mean, my God! She’s 30 years older than Ingid Bergman was when she made the film. I thought maybe Madonna might be more appropriately cast as the signer in Rick’s Café. That would be a nice cameo. Then let someone like Kiera Knightly or Miranda Cosgrove play the part of Ilsa.

This really bugged me. I first heard about it last week or the week before. It struck me as something I needed to blog about, but, as you all know, I’ve been struggling with malaise vis a vis my blog. So I let it stew. As my thoughts about this proposed abomination boiled on the back burner, it started to seem less like a bad idea, a moral outrage, and more like an interesting experiment.

First of all, Madonna has a knack for adopting accents. I’m sure she could pull off Der Deutsche in a heartbeat. She’s also got the body of an East German Olympiad, sinewy and taught. So, on screen, she should look and sound German, no problem.

Also, Ilsa has been around the block a few times. She was married, she had a fling with Rick, she went back to her husband when she realized he was still alive, she reunited with Rick and thought about going back to him. I think Madonna has the life experience to portray someone with these types of tendencies.

Besides, who wouldn’t want to hear her reinterpret the sound track? I loved her music that had Indian influences (Ray of Light). I’d be really keen to hear Madonna ala Morocco. I’m sure it would be awesome.

And finally, for some reason, the movie “Sunset Boulevard” keeps coming to my mind when I think of Madonna remaking Casablanca. This is truly a Norma Desmond move. And, if the fates intervene and Madonna is not physically stopped by the film police, I will be sitting in the middle of the row, two-thirds of the way back in the theater, the optimal viewing location (I will, of course, have the theater to myself), with my popcorn and twizzlers, thinking, “Bring it on!”

If this is made, it will be the train wreck of the century! But then again, aren’t all of her movies (except of course for Desperately Seeking Susan, which is genius, and the only movie she’s been in where she probably had no creative control) train wreck’s of the century?

I'm going to kill this blog.

It's been 3.5 years and I'm devoid of good ideas for this blog (see previous post). I'm sure I could continue to report the awesomeness of my kids, my observations of the world, my dreams of celebrities. But, in the words of Lili Von Shtupp: I'm tired. I'd also like to spend more time writing my novel and figuring out how to make money as an editor (my true passion is correcting other people).

I do plan on continuing on at Culture of Beer; I've received approval from the boss over there to be a regular contributor. I may also revive Poor Man's Telepathy. But when I come here to write, all I hear is:

I'm tired,

Tired of playing the game

Ain't it a crying shame

I'm so tired

God dammit I'm exhausted

It won't be an instant death. In fact, if anyone would like to guest host for me for awhile, we might be able to breath new life into this place. Just let me know in the comments or email me at greenpearl42 at yahoo dot com.

Peace out, my friends...I'll be at the bar, if you need me.

Love Grows Where My Rosemary Goes

It's Valentine's Day and you may find yourself casting about the internet looking for good love quotes with which to woo. I say, look no further than your own URL. I've compiled a list of love quotes from all of you. And to prove my love, I've linked you too. Enjoy, meine liebchene!

XOXOX

Anyhoos, because I love you all, I have roused myself from the couch and torn myself away from the Hell's Kitchen marathon and the giant lotion-infused box of tissues to wish you all a nice, you know, whatever the fuck it is you're celebrating.

---Vikitikitavi


I've always loved Crazy Straws!

---BSUWG


But then, I'd never fallen madly in love with a man who lives in fucking Michigan before. What's a girl to do but invest in a good pair of snow boots and throw caution to the wind?

---Megan


Anyone object if I take charge of Christmas dinner? I would love to roast a turkey in that stove!

---Coaster Punchman


I hope you get what you wanted, that you eat and drink too much, and hug someone you love.

---Doc


I love a woman who knows how to dress for the occasion.

---Beth


I know you love Harry Potter, but wizard please...

---Deadspot


Love and forgiveness are neither old nor new values; they are the timeless values that make us truly human.

---Elizabeth


I want to dream of beautiful things tonight. I want to dream of sexy women, and of a life that loves me. I want to wake up and find my world static for two minutes, so that I can pay my bills and find the sexy women that I dream of.

---Evil Genius

I love free.

---Phil


So far, the artificial heart is insufficiently open to let love in.

---Grant Miller


...but I love this song...

---Johnny Yen


What if radio stations did NOT play any lurvy-dovey-mushy-gooshy love songs for the month of February? What music would actually be LEFT??

---Hot Lemon


I love going out in a warm summer rain and dancing around in it. It just makes me feel alive and free. I spare the neighborhood and keep my clothes on, but the rest...they're just going to have to deal with it.

---Raven


But I really love the snow. I love how it sparkles in the sun, and when the wind blows it around the air sparkles.

---Amy


At this point people will say we’re in love and there might be something to it. Her coffee sucks.

---Dale


If you don't love it then you are obviously devoid of mirth.

---Pezda's Ghost


I don't believe in love at first sight.

---Skyler's Dad


I love it when restaurants give you a moist towelette. They smell awesome.

---Chris


Who doesn't love triangles?

---Splotchy


I hope tonight finds you surrounded by people you love, and who love you back.

---Bubs


Sweet sweet pink love, in all your soft cuddliness, drape yourself on me and whisper sweet nothings in my ear.

---Tanya


I do love you all.

---Tenacious S


If cancer is our love, then I hope you don't have the technology of chemotherapy.

---The Boob Lady


Love the banjo.
---BeckEye


Because I am merely a man, and I bring nothing but love for you, here comes the Wednesday 15:

---Frank


I love orange kitties!

---Kristi


I love you, man, but you need to just shut the fuck up .

---Genn6


Well said. Happy Valentine's Day, you mad, marvelous geniuses!

New Kid On The Blog: It's Jeff!

My good pal and co-worker, Jeff, has taken up the gauntlet and answered pointed questions from your's truely. He's a man who's decided to flaunt the advice to simplify. Check out what he has to say and find out why he hates wooden spoons.

You're All Wonderful Humanitarians!

I'm am so happy right now. Sure, I've got a good job that's close to home. I'm looking forward to spending the weekend with Doc. We've made it to our 10 year anniversary, almost. That's a lot to be happy for. But I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge a group of people that helped me pull through the dark times. Namely: You.

Sitting here at the computer, I've found a lovely group of friends who make me laugh, think, wonder and marvel. My life has been in a whirlwind for a good while now: but I knew I could count on signing in and hooking up to some wonderful stuff. The many kind words of encourage meant and the healthy doses of righteous anger you expensed on my behalf are what helped me beat this mess by a nose. I look forward to hanging with you without also hanging by my finger nails.

I wanted to thank you all from the bottom of my heart. And to show my appreciation I've designed a limited edition, lifetime Humanitarian Award (see above). If you like, you can snag it and post it on your blog to show the world what ginormous sweethearts you all are.

xoxox

Two Weeks Notice: A Midterm Update

I'm sitting here at my desk, racking my brains trying to find something to write about. Lately, everything that pops into my head that then makes it to my blog seems to be as fluffy and insubstantial as a cheese puff. Maybe it's because my life is in limbo. I have one more week after this one until I start my new job and there's nothing really for me to do, except clean out my desk.

I'm really mentally gone from this place. I don't even want to gather my stuff up. I just want to flip everyone the bird and flee. I've been trying to find other work for years with no luck and finally, finally, this new job drops out of the sky and into my lap, just in time. So, now I have six more days of long-distance commuting, six more days of blinking through the tears, six more days of repressed anger, six more days of looking busy.

How did I do it for so long, you wonder. Anti-depressants and a will to survive. For over four years now, I've sacrificed my autonomy and my identity. I've shut up and done what I was told. I've learned how to keep my distance from my work and take criticism like a man. I've discovered how to do things without caring about getting the credit. One thing I'm wondering is this: Is the only path to humility paved with humiliation? That was the path I've been on and it would be nice to know of another way.

I've been subordinated and exploited, then crumpled up and tossed out. But, they say, it's nothing personal, just business. I should dust myself off and move on, either by accepting the crumbs and sloppy seconds they offer me or turn away towards a new endeavor. Should it be the devil you know or the devil you don't know? I'll always opt for the devil I don't know and that's what makes me different from the people I work for. I'm willing to rock the boat. They are not. And that's a sad statement for many reasons.

So much the better that I can escape with my soul intact. I outlasted this job. I did not run away from adversity. I learned how to survive Theory X management. I've developed a nose for politics and a healthy respect for the power politics has to destroy. I've learned never to underestimate the cunning of those in power; how else did they get to the top? I have not been broken.

It's a dog-eat-dog world out there. I used to think that, at least in education, people's intentions were good. Not true. Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. I would urge you to keep an eye on education in your neck of the woods. There's a lot of money, a lot of power concentrated in the very few, and some wolves in sheep's clothing.

For now, I've hit the pause button in my lizard brain to numb myself to the indignity of it all. But, I swear, as God as my witness, I shall never be powerless again. I won't panic and take a job just because it's there. I won't blindly do what I am told in order to keep the peace. I will continue to accept feedback on my work, but I will also expect appropriate recognition and compensation. And I will get out of this pink collar world for a while.

But I haven't let myself dream about my next job. I don't want to create a set of expectations about my new work that will end up tripping me in the future. I want to go in with a clean slate and build my expectations based on reality. I don't want to make any assumptions, if I can help it. I want to take my time and feel my way around. But I can't think about that right now.

For now, I need to sort through the random items I've collected at my desk: piles of paystubs representing years of my life, old post cards, 3.5" floppy disks, FISH Philosophy goo-gahs, marbles (don't ask), a black thermal mug with flames on it, Christmas cards, ancient cup-a-soup, and a barrel of monkeys (sans barell). To tell the truth, I didn't bring a lot of personal stuff to work; I've had one foot out the door since I got here. So, packing up shouldn't be a lot of work.

But, having all this time on my hands, I'll be able to look around here and see what you all are doing and hear what you're thinking about. It's good to see that there are so many like-minded people out there with good hearts and good intentions. It gives me hope for humanity to know it, frankly. Maybe, while I'm in limbo, it might be a good idea to have someone else take over here for a while. With all the dark and thundery thoughts I have, I'm not sure I'll be able to keep up the froth.

Who's game?

Please Remain Calm

I am now in charge of Evil Genius' blog indefinately as he whisks himself away to an undisclosed location.

Look Out, Chicago!

Doc and I are coming to town. At the end of October, we will have been married 10 years and to celebrate, we are planning to have a weekend getaway in Chicago. We will be driving out on Friday, October 26th and we plan on staying Friday and Saturday night.

We would like to get together with any of you Chibloggoans who are free on the evening of Saturday, October 27th. If you all could think of a good place to meet, we'll be there with bells on. Also, if you know of a nice hotel with a good location that isn't too expensive, please let me know about it. I plan on booking a room in the very near future.

In the interim between now and the trip, We plan to study your culture so that we don't stick out as tourons. So, if there are any cultural taboos or traditions you want to warn us of, please do. We have seen the Blues Brothers and the Blues Brothers 2000, so I think we have the basics covered, but we would appreciate any advanced instruction.